Still Facing Change

I must be going through another period of change brought about by growing older and the challenges that entails. I’ve been going back and rereading some of my early post, back in 2012, when I was a new blogger and using my posts to share my struggles in learning to live with fibromyalgia. Writing was an exercise in healing and […]

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Facing Change – Maintaining Integrity

My doctor introduced me to the term “new normal” and it intrigued me – probably because I was well on my journey to finding one. And it was a hard journey, as bumpy and wild as the five-day tour of Kyrgyzstan in a 4-wheel drive van driven by a guide who had fantasies of being a bronco rider – more about that in future posts. The journey to a new normal was full of doubt, fear, pain, sadness, and anger and it required a major change (not just a shift) in how I thought about myself and my life. It took courage and perseverance; sometimes I wanted to give up but I didn’t know how. Even though I became discouraged at times, I always had a strong drive to find a way of living that had integrity. But what does a new normal consist of? I wrote this in my journal in October 2004, ten months after being diagnosed. For many years I have found strength and direction in the following words by James Baldwin (1961, Nobody Knows my Name, p.100):  Any real change implies the breakup of the world as one has always known it, the loss of all that gave one an identity, the end of safety. And at such a moment, unable to see and not daring to imagine what the future will now bring forth, one clings to what one knew, or thought one knew; to what one […]

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