Quiet and Disquiet
I’m wanting a quiet day – maybe a day to process all that has happened with the U.S. election. JB has asked a couple of times if I’m okay and I tell him I am. I know I am, although I feel a sense of disquiet. Maybe it is because my country is in turmoil and I like closure. I was looking forward to election day because I thought it would bring closure – but instead I find myself at the beginning of a long unknown.
I have felt a need to write, because writing clarifies and expands my understanding while also bringing a sense of healing when my heart is unsettled. But writing is hard work – and my energy has been low while my chronic pain is annoying. Fatigue and pain create a foggy mist through which I see dimly. Life seems strange right now.
For now I am finding joy in sharing some of the strangely beautiful orchids I found on my first visit of the season to the Naples Botanical Gardens on Tuesday. I am finding peace in enjoying all that is beautiful, all that is good and right. I find comfort in the ticking of the clock, the rising and setting sun, the rhythms of life. I was lifted up by the beautiful sound of 100 well-trained voices of the Naples Philharmonic Youth Chorus on Sunday. Yes, life is a miracle.
Yes, I can fill the disquiet with the quiet of all that is beautiful and honest. I can respond with integrity and humility as I love others as I have been loved. In a world that so often seems loud and brash, I enjoy reaching out and being touched with gentle love.
I will turn away from the disquiet of revenge, hate and anger, instead finding quiet peace within the teachings of my faith.