Sending you love today, the day after the contrived day designated for people in the US to tell their sweetheart that they love him/her. I think it drives men nuts – trying to figure out how to tell their significant other that they are loved. This is especially true when television ads are telling them to buy expensive jewelry, chocolates, and even a car as an expression of their love. Other sources indicate a meal at an expensive restaurant is the perfect way to say “I love you.” When we went to the Publix grocery last week he looked at the roses that had been marked $5 more than the week before but advertised as being on sale. He walked on because it rubbed his sense of fair play the wrong way.
Of course there are the romantic fellows who love to spend money on their sweetie. I suspect that behind every romantic fellow who is spending big bucks is a woman worrying how to pay next month’s credit card payment. JB, after 51 years of blissful marriage, still spends time fretting about what to get me and I am still telling him that I really don’t need or want anything so he shouldn’t spend the money. He understands this because he is more frugal than I am. But there is still that nagging message that boys should buy their girlfriend candy in a red, heart-shaped box. He did that when we were teens and dating – and with his very meager income it was a hardship that said “I love you.” I ate it up. The sentiment and the candy. I saved the box to hold mementos of our dates, like movie stubs and dance cards with no names listed because I danced every dance with him.
I don’t need the chocolate now because of weight issues (always) and would only be delighted if the chocolate came with a hefty price. My taste in chocolate has been refined with age. If he paid that much for the chocolate I would feel bound to eat it all, right? You can see how complicated all this romance can get.
Being the practical type I think we should just cut out the romantic crap that costs a lot of money and focus on what really matters. What matters is that we greet each other with a warm smile each morning and say that we love each other before we go to sleep each night. What matters is that we don’t do things that require us to tell lies and destroy trust, that we forgive each other when we get stressed and snarky. If every day is treated like Valentine Day, going to the grocery together is a romantic date and eating a grilled cheese sandwich super in front of the TV is as sweet as a candle light meal in a restaurant with white linen table coverings and napkins.
JB and I both need to hear that we love each other, but large sums of money don’t make the pronouncement more believable. What makes us so secure in our knowledge that we love each other is our consistent expressions of caring in everyday living. I’m thinking we need to show our love for each other tonight with a trip to the Dairy Queen for a mini Blizzard. I love the Snickers.